I've been thinking a lot about how I obtained such awesomness. Last night I connected with someone I thought I would never be able to call "friend."

I once dated this girl that, well lets be honest, was THE WORST person I could ever get involved with EVER. I was a shell of a person and to be honest I wasn't as good looking as I am now. Long hair past my shoulders (which is against one of my rules "NEVER trust a dude with hair past his shoulders"), a huge lumberjack beard and no fashion sense at all. I was much different than the legend I am now. Sure people knew me but they only knew the crappy hippie part of me.

After getting my heart broken into a million pieces (I know, i know, kinda sad and pathetic) I decided I needed to create a new person. I shaved my beard, cut off all my hair, changed my style and got my suit to fit me like some sort of sexy glove. Something happened, a metamorphosis, I became the legend I am today. My self-esteem skyrocketed, so did my awesomness! This was when I started to apply rules to my life. I found a new "Bible" called "The Bro-Code" 150 rules that if followed correctly will make you a living legend AND wait for it...wait for it... irresistible. Seriously I've had more confidence and luck in the last month than i have in years.

The only sad part is it works TOO well. I hate to admit it but I actually see futures with some people I meet. More about that later.

To sum it up. My life now is LEGEND...wait for it...DARY. LEGENDARY!

(NOTE: Ladies if you're reading this, first let me apologize; it was never my intention for this to change the way you look at guys. Second I urge you to look at this blog as a piece of fiction, a lot of this is made up. It is meant to entertain, mostly myself, as well as a broad audience through the prism of stereotypical gender differences. I mean, sometimes it really IS like we're from different planets! Clearly, no real person would actually follow "The Bro-Code" let alone adhere to it's rules BTW those boots are adorable. Guys: Article #4 you know what I mean.)